Defeated and in a state of utter despair and rampant obsessive jealous thoughts... I had a new plan. I decided I would post a Plenty-of-Fish online dating profile ... seriously. I did that.
Here's what it said:
Headline : Knocked up
About me :
So, funny storey...
I was in what I thought was my perfect relationship.. on the road to family town... then I get knocked up, awesome-sauce... then, big firey train wreck and we break up... not-so-awesome-sauce...
My friends and I decided we should see how many awesome-sauce baby-daddy wanna-bees are out there... or even just weirdos with pregnancy fetishes...I get hit in a lot with this bump, not gonna lie, I like it. I just want a good guy for myself and my little soon to be dude.
I am a BIG skier and love the outdoors.
I am looking for super awesome hot man who knows how to take care of a woman when she needs taking care of... (I actually stole that off the POF profile of Darrens ex-wife, just in case he ever found it and read it, I thought that would hit him below the belt...yes, that's as vengeful as I get, sad.)I am entrepreneurial and creative... if you can't handle random unpredictable passion and excitement... stick to your day job, this girl needs a man of steel...
Anything other than a comedy night... my personal experience is that men who take you to comedy shows, need defibrillators, well, I need a defibrillator... to get through it... no personality... just saying... Ill go skiing, walk, dinner, wine... keep it brief... I have a boredom threshold, so better make sure there is lots of good banter and fun before making any major time commitments... besides, I may need to pump... and lets face it... breast milk in your martini...not hot.